December 17, 1989
(I felt the Lord far away. I panic when I feel this way, I know it is entirely my fault and it’s a heavy trial again. On my private note book come out of my hand only scribbles. The Lord immediately came to my rescue and said, writing:
“Do I have to remind you not to leave your hand ‘free’? I want you to listen; I am near you, but your spirit is far from Me; listen, I, the Lord, want you to listen! unite with Me, be one with Me, I and you, you and I, then WE could work in one, see? be careful, Vassula;” – “by being united WE could join in the work;”
I had panicked, because by receiving revelations and having been guided in an extraordinary way, and having tasted Heaven and the Presence of God without any merits from my part, suddenly it had appeared as though Heaven slightly had closed Its doors and I did not feel His Presence.)
fear not, I had been eagerly waiting for these moments where I would be together with you, so never ever believe that I am closing you out; I simply challenged you to recover from your lethargy, and I shall work together with you till the end; let your heart exult with joy in My Presence, I still have many things to say to you but you would then be unable to take everything down; you are frail and I know that you are also weak;
come, you need not speak to Me with words to tell Me you love Me; speak with your heart: to desire Me, to love Me, to contemplate Me, and you are then doing My Will, because My Will is to love Me and to adore Me, so by just doing this, ALL is then done in Silence; offer Me your will, offer Me all that you have, will, self, pleasures, everything;
I offer You, my Lord, my will, self, pleasures, and all that You want. Feel FREE my King to just take and take from me as You please.
in return, do you still want My Cross of Peace and Love?
Yes, my Lord, entirely; even if by Its size I fall flat on the ground, I’ll carry It even if I have to crawl on my knees.
daughter, My Cross of Peace and Love shall sanctify many of My children; let Me enter and rest in your heart, I the Lord bless you; beloved, wait and you shall see;
I like it so much when You say “wait and you shall see!”
I know, little one; we, us?
Yes, my Lord.
we, us?
Yes, Holy Mother.