March 6, 1995
(Suddenly the Cross on me became too heavy.)
In the beginning my Lord,
You cuddled me and watched each breath of mine
with a motherly tenderness.
You modelled me, remember,
as soft clay is modelled with so much care,
never have I felt that I was being felled
so that I can start my life again;
so tender was Your touch.
You then endowed me with Your Holy Spirit, the Life-Giver,
and my days since then ran hurrying by,
seeing only delight in their flight;
Why am I today trodden by the insensitive
who cannot peer through their shadowed darkness?
They who live under an impenetrable veil
and who have to grope their way when they have to walk?
You promised me that their greatness
will be brought to nothing
and their wisdom to dust.
You are known to save those of downcast eyes and the innocent,
You are known to take note of everything said and done,
am I to be constantly crushed beneath the Rubble? 1
How much more can I be struck?
Has my staggering not challenged You yet?
Can I become more abject than I am already?
And now You delight to have me
where light itself is like the dead of night.
listen, My lamb: to tell you now that I will unburden2 you from My Cross, you so generously asked Me to share with Me, would be complete folly on My part! the trials you are bearing for Me are not more than anyone has …. do not lose heart, daughter, and do not venture to say: “has He who assesses the heart no understanding?” My Wisdom cannot be explored by men;
look! your race is not over, after all have you not heard with what desperation the prisoners of Hades3 knock on your door? 4 have I not schooled you so that your heart understands your mission? Vassula! have you not heard their groans? tormented in the night, those souls dash at your door for help; 5 you are feeble and you waver now ….. do not disappoint Me …..
in time of famine I came to you to nourish you and again, in time of death, I will save you; so make Me happy and allow Me to use you for My Interests; love Me and let your love for Me augment so that vermin will never cover your flesh; augment your prayers and offer them for My intentions; I will never hide My Face from you, never;6
Fruit of My Love, Flower of My Thorned Crown, Blossom of My Church, do not be intimidated by My Nails; Pupil-of-My-Council, do you not know that humiliation and calumny sanctify you? have you forgotten that I have counted you as one of My daughters of My Church? what is more desirable than being kin to My Blood? I Myself have chosen you to be My mouthpiece over many nations and teach you the Sacred Writings7 by dropping in your mouth My Knowledge like honey that drips from the comb; My Knowledge is sweet, but also sour; 8 sweet, because I am announcing My glorious triumph with My people, and sour, because of this painful apostasy of My Church preceding My victory…
ahh9 generation! the hour of darkness is upon you now that you have embarked into the boat of death, it will lead you to death; the danger signal was given to you now close to ten years; 10 it had been echoing in your ear close to ten years, but you were fleeing from My Voice thundering all this while …. foreigners have been more attentive and sensitive to My Voice than you, you11 who call My Name daily and raise Me daily; if only you could listen, if only you who are dying would see My saving help! but a veil of shadow hangs over your eyes …. ah, 12 if you only knew how utterly dead you are and how the rest of you have become grave-diggers for your own graves …. to bear witness against My Holy Spirit and to try to conceal My Works that are for My Glory will lead you into eternal fires;
I tell you, daughter, there is no fathom to My sorrow, so allow Me, daughter, to share My Cross with you, and allow Me to continue to cultivate you till the end; turn your eyes to Me and never leave Me from your sight; I promise you that I will accomplish your mission together with you; avoid any tendency to administration, for such has been the true cause of this perilous delay! make My Message known to everyone and show them that I am a God who saves;