September 25, 1992

Here I am,
to pick up my steps over these endless ruins,
with a load on my back.
I come to You for consolation, for relief,
and now the strength in me trickles away,
and I am gnawed by grief that never sleeps.

With immense effort I cross the terrors of this endless Night,
enfeebled by the cynicism of these false witnesses
who plague my innocence all day long.
It was Your pleasure to give me the key on matters
my soul could have never understood alone,
on marvels beyond me and my knowledge,
and for this reason they hound my innocence.

There, in every obscure corner, they await for an opportunity
to plunder my life if that were possible.
They call themselves Your people, thinking their mouth is heaven,
but what they proffer is false, fallacious and misleading.
I am trying to be bold and show a bold face around
but they are constantly gnawing on me.

The godless have more charity and humility
than those who claim they follow Your Law
but never stop judging
and have not the least hesitation to condemn,
bringing misery crashing down on me.
Were they godless who judge me, I could put up with that,
but THEY, who call themselves Your people! People of God!
to whom baptism bounds us together in Your House ….

I complain, but have I not the right
to unload my burden onto You Lord now and then?
Yes, I know I sound and I look like a walking Lamentations Book,
but I live my life in innocence,
so relieve me for just a while, Lord!

Vassula …. do not fret and wail bitterly while being nailed on My Cross, take Me as an example of dignity; soon the darnel will be pulled up from the wheat before any one of you realises; I have rescued you many times from the snares of your enemies who hoped to destroy you; then, daughter, why do you fear the terrors of the Night? I am only combating inside you …. leave Me alone when I am on My way to the inner room of your soul:

My Dwelling Place;

I have told you before that your soul will leap like on fire every time My Hand falls, shattering My rivals that take My place; I am Master and intend to remain your Master; I have set you as My Target for My arrows; no, Vassula, grace does not go without suffering; oh, what will I not do to My closest ones, to My dearest friends! 1

Then, allow me to take the words of Saint Theresa of Avila and tell You, “No wonder You have so few friends!”

all men are weak …. nevertheless, I will reply to your comment and tell you: if your soul only knew what I am offering and doing to you, you would have been the one to ask Me for more trials, sufferings, crosses, the lot! – I discipline those I love so do not object to what seems good to Me; you are My jewel and like some precious stone, I cut, carve and form you into the shape I have in Mind; therefore, I tell you, as long as you have breath inside you, you must carry out the work I, Myself, have given you; as for those who call themselves Mine yet are offensive when it comes to spiritual matters, I tell them: “if you were blind you would not be guilty, but since you say, ‘we see and can tell’, your guilt remains!” how many times will I have to reproach them for their incredulity and obstinacy?

come, be in Peace – I am with you for the rest of your journey;

1 Jesus was full of delight.